I've sat here so many times wondering what it's all about.  The pain, the happiness, the tears, the smiles. and all that time i've been still.  trying to remember so much that has happend to so many of us.  sitting still for way to long and just feeling the waves wash over me.  i can't seem to stop them, i can't seem to start them.  just for too long have i waited here.  i keep wondering what its all about, ya know?  i've cried but i still forced a smile.  and i've smiled with gut wrenching pain. and i've cried those wonderful tears of joy.  but sometimes i just wonder.  why do i bother, why do i even care about things like this.  all i know is that there is this hole in all of us, we don't know what will fill it, so we just try and try. some get it on the first shot, others never make it.   too many times its the later...  so who knows...  all i can think about now, is what's it all about?  some say love, others money, and a few say the chance to do some good.  a million and one answers to a question, all are true and all are false.  just what can we do to find our answer.  try and fail and try to succeed.  even with the greatest possibilities of hope


there still is that chance of pain.....